Building trust through conversations about faith

Now that you’ve begun rebuilding your relationship with your loved one, and they’re becoming more comfortable talking with you, we can begin taking the next step.

Start showing genuine interest in their religious beliefs.

Remember our atheist example?

The same principle applies to your loved one in Shincheonji.

Instead of immediately challenging their beliefs, begin asking about their perspective.

For example:

And then listen.

We’re not trying to catch them in a contradiction. We’re trying to understand how they see the world.

This is important because your loved one isn’t simply someone who has been “brainwashed” and no longer has thoughts of their own.

They have their own reasons, experiences, emotions, and motivations for believing what they believe.

We want to understand those things.

As they explain their beliefs, pay attention to how they interpret Scripture, what they find convincing, and what matters most to them.

You may disagree with their conclusions, but you can still genuinely appreciate their desire to understand God and study the Bible.

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Invite them to teach you individually

As your loved one becomes more comfortable discussing religion, we can begin introducing another approach.

Ask your loved one if they would be willing to explain a Bible passage to you personally.

For example:

Or:

There’s an important distinction here.

We’re not asking to attend a Shincheonji Bible course, join their Bible study, or meet with their instructor.

We’re asking our loved one to explain the Bible to us, in their own words, one-on-one.

Why?

Because we want to understand what they personally believe and how they arrived at those conclusions.

When someone attends a structured Shincheonji lesson, the teacher generally controls the material, the explanations, and the direction of the conversation.

But in a personal conversation, you have an opportunity to hear how your loved one understands and explains the passage themselves.

You may discover that they understand certain teachings very well.

You may also discover that they rely heavily on explanations they’ve memorized without having independently examined the surrounding biblical context.

Either way, we’re learning more about how they think.

If they prefer having a mentor present, you don’t need to argue about it. You can simply explain that you’re interested in hearing their personal understanding rather than attending a formal lesson.

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Begin asking questions

Now we can begin introducing questions.

But before we do, remember something important.

We’re not trying to embarrass our loved one, prove they’re ignorant, or force them to admit that Shincheonji is wrong.

Instead, we’re trying to understand how they reason through Scripture.

For example, suppose your loved one explains a particular interpretation of Revelation.

Rather than immediately presenting a counterargument, you might ask:

Or:

Or even:

Notice what these questions have in common.

They aren’t accusations.

They invite your loved one to explain their reasoning.

And as you listen, you may begin to understand which conclusions they’ve reached through their own examination of Scripture and which explanations they’ve primarily learned from their teachers.

The goal is to encourage your loved one to examine and explain their beliefs independently, rather than simply repeat what someone else has told them.